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The content of this article is not part of official Warcraft lore, but has nevertheless become part of the World of Warcraft culture or community.
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Gnomeregan Gnews Gnetwork

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The award-winning Gnomeregan Gnews Gnetwork has been tireless in their journalistic quest to bring the most important news affecting the world. These news were shown in the official videos: WoW Gameplay Trailer: Nether Drake,[1] The Burning Crusade Launch: The Video[2] and in News From Outland: Crisis at Da Portal!.[3] Subtitled versions of the news can be found on the European official site.[4]

WoW Gameplay Trailer: Nether Drake[]

  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Hi! I'm your field corpus- corsep- I'm reporter Wendy Breezy! We're here in Outland with Mr. Barley Frothbeard to talk about flying mounts. Helping us today will be our intern: P. Diddimus.
  • IconSmall Gnome Male P. Diddimus: Yo.
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: So, Mr. McFrothbeard-
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Call me Barley, you wee trollop.
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: So, Barley, what level would you have to be for this kind of mount?
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Well, let's put it this way: If you're not level 70: Go home!
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: So could you tell us a little about the testing phase that led to your success?
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Oh yeah! Early on we tested lots of different prototypes!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male P. Diddimus: (Riding a yeti off the edge) Fly, fly! Please fly! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Of course it wasn't an exact science, y'know.
  • IconSmall Gnome Male P. Diddimus: (Trying to fly on a turtle, hen trying to mount Onyxia) Hey, dragon. I'm gonna mount you. AAHH! AAHH! DRAGON NOOO!
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Sounds like a lot of trial and mistakes!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Don't you mean trial and error?
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Sure thing! So exactly how does someone get a flying mount?
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Oh, all kinds of different ways. Quests, reputation... (Drinks, then burps) Where was I? Oh- shopkeepers, or a combination of those.
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Super! So I understand, you're going to show us how to fly one!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Hell, I'm flyin' already! Woohoo! (Walks to nether drake) That's daddy's nether drake! I call him "Spanky"! The only drawback to these babies is, they don't have cupholders! Handyman! Hold this! (Diddimus takes McFrothbeard's mug) Alright now, let's get this party started!
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Now let's go to Strombone in our Gnome Gnews Gyrocopter!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Strombone: Strombone standing by!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: YAAHOOOO! YEAHAHAHA! Ooohh, me head's gone all flattery!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Strombone: Stombone thinks this dwarf is nuts!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Oh yeah, I can't wait to fly Spanky in Dun Morogh!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Strombone: Strombone thinks he forgot, these mounts only exist in Outland!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: I'm turning corners like she's on rails! (Thrallmar comes into view) Ah, what's this? Permission to buzz the tower?
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Strombone: Strombone says negative! Don't buzz the tower!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: (Buzzes the tower) WOOHOO, I'm going ballistic! Ye couldn't hit the broad side of a barn, you dodgy-eyed half-wits! AHAHAHAHA!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Strombone: Uh, Wendy, back to you. Strombone wants to go home.
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Thanks, Strombone! Okay, let's watch the landing!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male P. Diddimus: (Drinks the last of McFrothbeard's ale)
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: I said you could hold me ale, not drink it! I'm gonna make you a hood ornament, you big-eared git! YEEEEAAAAARRRGH! (He runs over Diddimus)
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Oh my!
  • Unknown voice: Healer! We need a healer!

News From Outland[]

Introduction[]

In their latest segment, they turn their attention to the goings-on in some place called "Outland". Intrepid reporters of the GGG investigate the seemingly endless battle at the Dark Portal, the mysterious depletion of Zangarmarsh, and the source of a foul odor emanating from Shattrath's Lower City...[3]

Transcript[]

  • ESRB: Rated teen for teen.
History Re-imagined and ZoneDiscovery are played.
  • Unknown person #1: Gnomeregan Gnews. With... News Anchor Mar'Lee.
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: Tank you for tunin' in. Tonight's top story be: CRISIS at da PORTAL!
CRISIS AT THE Portal
Demon onslaught hindered by Horde and Alliance forces.
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: Since da portal's re-openin', multitudes a demons been pourin' tru, wid both da Horde and the Alliance tryin' to push dem back.
    On tonight's edition of Callout we talk to a demon expert, da warlock, N. Kagnito...
CALLOUT
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: We also have wid us, da self-proclaimed mouthpiece of da people, Barley McFrothbeard.
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: I say we round up all these red-eyed demon freaks and send 'em right back to Outland with their pointy tails between their sissy legs!
  • IconSmall Orc Male N. Kagnito: I think calling them "demons" is a gross generalization. Why does everything has to have a label? I mean, who made them the bad guys all of a sudden?
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Oh, they only want to DESTROY AZEROTH, ya flea-brained twit!
  • IconSmall Orc Male N. Kagnito: Nonsense! They are just misunderstood.
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: They'll kill us all, ya gibberin' buffoon!
  • IconSmall Orc Male N. Kagnito: Oh, I suppose you can read their minds all of a sudden.
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Their demonic energy corrupts and destroys!
  • IconSmall Orc Male N. Kagnito: I use demonic energy every day. I'm not corrupted.
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: Your eyes are glowing!
  • IconSmall Orc Male N. Kagnito: Well, I... I have cataracts...
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: And you have horns growing from yer—
—wait a minute. You're one of them, aren't ya? (shot sound)
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: Well, dat was a close one.
  • IconSmall Orc Male N. Kagnito: Aaaaaaahhhh!
  • IconSmall Dwarf Male Barley McFrothbeard: (Clearing throat)
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: Uh, oh, now, let's go on-location to Wendy Breezy. How you doin', Wendy?
LIVE
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Just super Mar'Lee, thanks! I'm standing here with Commander Duron, who is leading the Alliance Forces against the Burning Legion here at the Portal! Mr. Duron, tell us how you're holding up against these unending waves of demons?
  • IconSmall Human Male Commander Duron: Well, Wendy, I...
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: What's it's like to see your comrades gleefully dismembered by these marauding agents of evil?
  • IconSmall Human Male Commander Duron: Oh, yes, oh, oh, uh, yes...
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Comrades who are undoubtedly leaving behind devastated orphans and widows!
  • IconSmall Human Male Commander Duron: Maybe we should—
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: How long do you think this assault will last, given that the Legion is estimated to number... in the millions?
  • IconSmall Human Male Commander Duron: Sorry, but... duty calls.
  • IconSmall Gnome Female Wendy Breezy: Truly a man of few words. Well, this is Wendy—
  • Unknown person #2: CUT TO COMMERCIAL! CUT TO—
PLEASE STAND BY
The commercial World of Warcraft Valentine's Day Commercial is played.
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: Welcome back.
MARCH IN THE MARSH
Special enviromental report from Zangarmarsh.
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: We go now to a special enviromental report with investigator journalist, Spoggle Greasecakes.
Investigative report from Spoggle Greasecakes.
Written on the reporter's screen: Shady Ventures
Zangarmarsh
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Spoggle Greasecakes: But what you don't know is that there are new and sinester forces at work in Outland as well, in the tranquil ecosystem of Zangarmarsh.
Ogre Ramage!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Spoggle Greasecakes: This large mushroom, for instance, is being robbed of its natural gifts. This unscrupulous pilfering has drastically changed not only the local ecology, but the economy as well. As you can guess, the many pro-enviromental groups are not too happy about it.
  • IconSmall Tauren Female Tala Snowgraze: What do we want?
  • IconSmall Human MaleIconSmall NightElf MaleIconSmall NightElf FemaleIconSmall Tauren MaleIconSmall Troll Male Voices United: A clear marsh! A safe marsh!
Written on the reporter's screen: Circle of Defiance Rallying for the Cause
  • IconSmall Tauren Female Tala Snowgraze: When do we want it?
  • IconSmall Human MaleIconSmall NightElf MaleIconSmall NightElf FemaleIconSmall Tauren MaleIconSmall Troll Male Voices United: Now!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Spoggle Greasecakes: I attempted to interview the ogres on the subject, but they simply play dumb.
  • IconSmall Ogre Male "The Big Chopper": What ecology means? ME SMASH YOU!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Spoggle Greasecakes: Truly, Zangarmarsh is a land beset by conflict.Its woes come not only from the ogres, but from the secret and sinester naga as well.
  • IconSmall Tauren Female Tala Snowgraze: The naga... those vile creatures have begun draining the swamp precious waters for some unknown purpose. Of course, we have vowed to stop them.
  • IconSmall Tauren Male Unknown tauren #1: Stop the draining!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Spoggle Greasecakes: We caught up with a naga spokesmen, who had this to say:
  • IconSmall Naga Male Mal'aga: Our enviromental expert assures us that our activities in Zangarmarsh are in no way harming the eviroment. Isn't that right Mr. Stickyfingers.
  • IconSmall LeperGnome Male Mr. Stickyfingers: (nodded his face)
  • IconSmall Tauren Male Unknown tauren #1: Stop the murder!
Written on the reporter's screen: March in the Marsh
  • IconSmall HarvestGolem Unknown harvest golem #1: Unfortunately it seems the evidence is clear: unless the Cenarion Circle gets help, the region of Zangarmarsh may be doomed.
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Spoggle Greasecakes: Back to you, Mar'Lee!
  • IconSmall Succubus Unknown succubus #1: mob sound
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: Shoking, mon! In udda news a foul odor swept across Shattrath City and into Terokkar Forest, sickenin' all da victims in its path.
WRATH IN SHATTRATH
Unknown odor wreaks havoc on city.
  • IconSmall Khadgar Khadgar: Never in all my days in Outland have I smelled such a terrible stench.
Lower City, Shattrath
  • IconSmall Khadgar Khadgar: We have refugees from all over in this city, so the Light only knows where this noxious odor is emanating from.
  • IconSmall Khadgar Khadgar: We do know this much: it is silent, and it is deadly.
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Strombone: Strombone was wondering, has anything like this happened before?
  • IconSmall Khadgar Khadgar: The only time we had a stench like this, Tobias had whipped up some sort of rare delicacy.
Interview with Tobias
  • IconSmall Broken Male Tobias the Filth Gorger: I don't know what might be causing this alleged odor, but it would have to come from an object so rare and so foul... kind of like this rotten arakkoa egg here. It's unique in that it— oh! Excuse me!
  • IconSmall Gnome Male Strombone: (Vomiting)
  • IconSmall Human Boy Gordie: It's a complete and total barf-o-rama! Run for your lives!
  • IconSmall Troll Male Mar'Lee: Da last time I seen something like dat was at a Level 70 ETC concert. Well, dat concludes our broadcast. Dis be Ancor Mar'Lee, and dat be da news!

Downscreen news[]

The following news where presented in the bottom of the screen during the video:

  • BoE Index:
    • RPVT -0.37
    • Greens -203
    • Blues +2204
    • Purples + 48.6
  • Ore Index:
    • Copper -0.02
    • Tin +2.14
  • Millions of demons invade Azeroth. Horde and Alliance forces stand strong.
  • Another nether storm ravages... Netherstorm?
  • Venture Company credits record earning to hero migration from Azeroth to Outland after Dark Portal's reopening.
  • Economists concerned with influx of raw material gathered in Outland.
  • Gnomish thief captured in Tanaris, blames evil twin.
  • Breaking News! Infernal lands near Gnomeregan Gnews HQ in Shattrath City. Origin unknown.
  • Tanaris gnome's accomplice captured, blames evil triplet.
  • Wendy Breezy miraculously survives direct impact from infernal strike. Dozens of interns rushed to Sacred Hearth Medical Center in critical condition.
  • Search party for missing protesters in Zangarmarsh called off.
  • SPG -0.27
  • DEF +0.06
  • WSO +0.15
  • FWC -0.31

Notes[]

  • Although Strombone says "Strombone was wondering, has anything like this happened before?" in the subtitles it says: "Can you tell us if anything like this happened before?"

Characters[]

News Anchor[]

Field Reporters[]

Investigative Reporter[]

Interns[]

Guest appearances[]

Cameos[]

Prizes[]

They received the Best Show Starting with a Silent Letter (News or Comedy), Azeroth Media Awards in 2004 and 2006.[3]

References[]

 
  1. ^ Blizzard Entertainment Inc. 2006-05-01. WoW Gameplay Trailer: Nether Drake (English). Retrieved on 2009-11-18.
  2. ^ Blizzard Entertainment Inc. 2006-05-01. The Burning Crusade Launch: The Video (English). Retrieved on 2009-11-18.
  3. ^ a b c Blizzard Entertainment Inc. 2007-04-19. (G)News From Outland: Crisis at Da Portal! (English). News From Outland: Crisis at Da Portal. Retrieved on 2009-07-20.
  4. ^ Blizzard Entertainment Inc. 2007-04-19. Media -> Movies (English). News From Outland: Crisis at Da Portal. Retrieved on 2009-11-18.
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